Nothing has changed

To emphasize, everything said in this video would never be said in a fighter squadron. Most of which would include at a minimum a fine or drive a Friday story…

Before I started writing today, I got squirreled on a question about flying fighters and stumbled on this video. Basically, the book I am writing and the current fighter pilot’s sense of humor is alive and well. Here is the video – I can explain all if necessary, but you had to peel me off the floor I was laughing so hard because I haven’t been in a squadron for 18 years and nothing has changed!


Sh!t Fighter Pilots Don’t Say – YouTube 

Maybe my writing is relevant and current.

Lead-in Fighter Training

The next step in between UPT and RTU was LIFT. In Air Force acronyms … Undergraduate Pilot Training, Reserve Training Unit (later Fighter Training Unit), and Lead-In Fighter Training.

At that time, LIFT was held in the middle of the White Sands National Park, just outside Alamogordo, New Mexico, at a sprawled out Air Force base called Holloman. When I got there in early 1989, there were three squadrons of F-15A and four squadrons of AT-38B aircraft at the base.

For me, the best part of Holloman was that it was owned by Tactical Air Command (TAC) soon to be Air Combat Command (ACC), meaning I was out of Air Training Command (ATC) and officially attached to a fighter unit; but still a student in all measures.

I walked around in awe. These instructors or I dare say “fighter” pilots, were different. They had swagger. Their flight suit zippers didn’t quite get up to regulation and they rolled up or under their sleeves with stars sewed on them representing flying and combat hours. And, they all added this little “crook” in the back of their hats. All the photos of the legends had it: Chuck Yeager, Steve Ritchie, Robin Olds, and so did these Captains.

Since I had a late RTU start date, my training had been delayed; and most of my UPT class was already hard at work. So, I joined a new group of recent graduates and we hung out waiting to for our program to begin. Wanting to get to know each other, we met at the Officer’s club to hang out.

This wasn’t the generic, clean, orderly ATC officer’s club. It was full of history, memorabilia, a strange pool table with just two balls, a dartboard, a foosball table, and a slight stench of stale beer. There were mugs hanging on the walls, it was, we had arrived at … Mount Olympus!

We sat down in a relatively empty bar and started jockeying and one-upping each other with stories from our vast treasure trove of experience (1-year at pilot training). I eventually wandered up to the bar and looked around.

There was a shiny bronze bell behind the bar. Oh, I knew the lore, for I had interned at a fighter squadron in Vegas. “Ring the bell and buy the bar!” I chuckled.

And then, I saw it… there it was, an F-15 Stick Grip sticking out of the bar. YGTBSM! OK – you are right, I didn’t have that language at the time. I think I thought … “Uh – Wow.”

The stick serpent started whispering to me, “Come over here, little baby pilot, you’ve been waiting your whole life to touch me, give me a go.” Something didn’t feel right. What was an F-15 stick doing sticking up out of the bar? My spidey senses were tingling and I heard Admiral Akbar say “It’s a trap.” But I paid no heed. I saw the shot and took it, there was no danger… (Top Gun quote)

So yup, dagnabit, I grabbed that stick. I pulled the trigger, I pushed the buttons, I saw myself bearing down on a MiG-29. And then, I was jolted out of my dream by the loud ringing of the bell. The bartender was up and rapidly serving the appeared masses. Oh shit! The trigger on the stick rings the bell and I was caught, red-handed – so to speak!

“Yup, ring the bell and buy the bar.” And so I did. A hundred-dollar lesson. Needless to say, besides the hole in my pocket, it was an epic night!

Ejection Seat Training



A major question of leadership is “Can Leadership Be Taught?” This question stems from the idea that initially, anything that is taught may only be understood in the mind.    And our mind is a “meaning-making machine” so it immediately starts by trying to understand new ideas by creating associations with things it thinks it understands.   Thus, learning something new – like flying an aircraft, without previous or worse, different associations, is difficult.   

Being playfully Socratic is to ask “whether something that exists only in the mind actually exists at all?”   I only pull this thread because until I experience something physically or emotionally in combination with the intellectual, does it become understood within me.    Therefore, I have found that teaching leadership, or anything else, requires the student to experience it themselves.    So, NO, leadership cannot be taught, it must be learned.   Brian Johnson expresses his learning philosophy in the statement “Theory to Practice to Mastery.”   Thus it is the practice and the work toward mastery that takes us to learning.


A major question of leadership is “Can Leadership Be Taught?” This question stems from the idea that initially, anything that is taught may only be understood in the mind.    And our mind is a “meaning-making machine” so it immediately starts by trying to understand new ideas by creating associations with things it thinks it understands.   Thus, learning something new – like flying an aircraft, without previous or worse, different associations, is difficult.   


Whether purposeful or not, the Air Force has developed its flight training around these ideas.   Each phase begins in the classroom, where we are taught an aspect of training.   We learn physiology, weather, aircraft systems, normal and emergency procedures, “contact” flying, instruments, formation training, etc.  But then, it is taken out of the classroom.


For example, we are taught ejection procedures; a really important subject for a really dangerous moment.   Something that, through thousands of practice iterations, it is deeply ingrained in my subconscious.   Something I was fortunate to ever have had to execute; but have many friends who have.


The boldface for ejection in the T-37 was “handles pull, triggers squeeze.”   Seems like a relatively benign statement; but if you were in an unrecoverable spin, where a second of delay might mean death, it is important.       


When I was training in the RF-4C, a student put the jet out of control and delayed ejection.   The backseat WSO initiated the ejection late; because of the ejection sequence, he was saved but the pilot was lost.


In a similar example, one of my good friends was landing an RF-4C with a broken hydraulic line to an aileron, making the aircraft roll unstable.     As he approached the runway threshold, he unconsciously added the normal small inputs to stabilize the aircraft and it began to roll wildly.   The WSO was quick to see a diminishing window of opportunity and successfully ejected himself and the pilot as the aircraft tumbled down the runway.    The pilot, “Ironman,”  left the aircraft a few feet above the ground, basically ejecting sideways with his parachute blooming horizontally as it set him on the ground.  

The legend (and we made it a legendary bar story) is that the WSO ran over to him so quickly, that he was laying on the ground in the fetal position, still trying to fly the non-existent aircraft; with his legs moving as if he was running a sprint.   Thank God the WSO had the capacity and training to eject them within a nano-second of opportunity.  


In order to obtain this capacity, we had to do more than simply be taught to eject.


Back to pilot training, before we could initiate the ejection boldface, you had to get into an ejection position, to avoid breaking your back or hitting your feet during the 20 Gs you would feel being propelled out of the aircraft, yell  “bailout, bailout, bailout”  and pull the handles.
Then, the life-support trainers would sit you into a mock cockpit and you would practice “ejecting.”    This unique seat was special as it would shoot you up a hydraulic pole about six feet to ensure you experienced the first moments of a real ejection (at a much lesser actual G-loading).   Doing this scares the bejeezus out of you, so you capture the lesson quickly, avoiding the need to do it twice.   


Next, they hang you in an ejection harness as if you were floating in a parachute.   The trainers take you through a sequence I remember today.   Canopy, Visor, Mask, Seat Kit, LPU, 4-Line, Steer, Prepare for PLF (parachute landing fall), look to the horizon and hit the ground.    And there were a set of procedures for trees, powerlines, water, etc.    Once landed, there is another entire set of activities based on peacetime training or combat ejection.     Mostly, “drink your water” and take a breath.

Back to pilot training, after sitting in the harness, they would send you outside where you practice your PLF into “pea” gravel.   You started by falling into it, then you jump off a one-foot platform and work yourself up to three feet.     Finally, they would re-harness you to a rope and parachute where a jeep would pull you airborne so you could practice your landing.    Although very serious, we would laugh as each student would strive to provide a meaningful antic to outdo the previous one.    I remember K+10 splitting his legs into a set of splits, as that became drinking lore for the rest of UPT.   

So the Air Force recognized that learning takes place beyond the mind.    And even though I went through ejection seat training in 1988, almost 35 years ago, and certified annually, I never used it; but know it viscerally!